Have you ever had the experience of hearing or reading about the same concept over and over for a period of time – from difference sources – and you begin to feel like the Universe is trying to tell you something? Well, every so often this happens to me.
Most recently it's been one word: Acceptance. That’s what keeps coming up.
In the past month, I've read Eckhart Tolle’s The Power of Now and A New Earth. I’ve had them for months, but only just recently felt ready to read them. I’ve also read Super Rich, by Russell Simmons, a Mother’s Day gift.
In all of those: Acceptance. Acceptance. Acceptance. Why does this keep coming up??
On top of that, I read the May 2011 issue of Fear.less magazine. The entire issue should have been called "Be in Acceptance". One of the articles is an interview with a young man, Josh Sundquist, who lost his left leg to cancer, but still has managed to become a ParaOlympic skier. He talked about how acceptance helped him to cope.
Here it goes again: acceptance.
To be clear, it’s an acceptance of what is – right now, at this moment – which is really all we have. The past is over and the future has not yet happened. At first it seems counter intuitive, but being in acceptance of what is makes it easier to change. You just let the situation sit within in you, not fighting it. I have to admit, at first this concept sounded like resignation. I mean, when you accept something, doesn’t that imply you won’t try to change anything – just take it as it is?
But you’re not resigning to anything. It’s just getting off of that mental merry-go-round from hell - also known as resistance – where you keep torturing yourself with the things you wish were different - by thinking about it over and over. Acceptance is being through with the impossible task of trying to re-write history or living perpetually in the future, where we often think that things will be so much better. When you finish school, when you get a better job, when you find a mate, when the kids are older, when you lose weight – whatever that special “event” is. It’s making a “grass is greener” situation with our own future – we will never win.
We’ve all been resistant to what is. We’ve seen it in action too. Have you ever seen someone that hasn’t accepted that they are now a parent? The baby is four years old, but mom/dad is still trying to party like a rock star, hang out and pretend they don't have to buy baby food. They haven't released their old, pre-baby life. It's painful to watch and you feel sorry for the kid. That’s resistance. According to Tolle, it’s like deciding to dig in the trash and eat the food you threw away days ago.
The present is really all you have. Being present is the key to acceptance. If you focus on only the moment that you are in, you’ll find that everything you think you’d like to worry about does not matter. In this moment, just feeling your lungs expand with air and being blessed enough to experience the wonder of sight and hearing, you can know that you have everything you truly need in this world.
Being present is just what it suggests. Being. Here. Fully.
When you are having a conversation, it’s really listening – instead of waiting for the other person’s mouth to stop moving so you can talk again. It’s really being there with your kids, instead of thinking of the 500 other things you have to do after you stop playing with them. The 500 things will still be there, but that moment will be gone forever.
Since this kept coming up over and over, surely it must mean that I need to pay attention. It’s time for me to be present – right now. It’s time for me to be happy just where I am, because I am alive. That doesn’t mean that I’m not still moving toward my goals, it means I’m no longer consumed with the idea that happiness is a destination that I won’t reach until some abstract time in the future, it’s right now. I’ve decided to make a concerted effort to quiet the incessant chatter in my mind that’s pulling me in a 100 different directions – away from the present.
I’ve just begun, so I’ll let you know how it goes.
