1.05.2015

It's your world, kid. The rest of us just payin' rent.


Ta eph’hemin and Ta ouk eph’hemin are ancient Greek phrases.  They literally mean “what is up to us” and “what is not up to us”.

The older I get, I’m starting to think that most (if not all) of life can really be separated into these two categories.   Like sorting laundry. 

What is up to us? Our thoughts, our actions, our efforts, our attitude. 

What is not up to us?  Other people – their thoughts, actions, effort and attitude.

I was reminded of these phrases by the recent death of Stuart Scott, the beloved ESPN anchor. It's one of his memorable catchphrases that is the title of this post.  At 49 years old, he’d been beating cancer for seven years.  

Seven years.

He was fighting for his life the entire time - with treatments, surgeries, kickboxing, going to work and being with his family.  Living his life on his terms.  Only dealing in ta eph’hemin.   

Last year, Stuart received the Jimmy V Espy Award for Perseverance.  In his acceptance speech he said “When you die it does not mean that you lose to cancer. You beat cancer by how you live, why you live, and in the manner in which you live.”

It’s the basic power of choice.  We don’t get to choose what happens to us, but we do get to choose how we react to what has happened.  If Stuart Scott could choose to persevere in the face of death, then what is our problem?  

No, really, what is it? 

Most of us aren’t facing a life-threatening situation; we’re dealing with hurt feelings or our egos or worrying about what other people think, all the while we’re still floundering.

OK, so what if we established our own little Ta eph’hemin /Ta ouk eph’hemin litmus tests in the 2015?  Each day, we simply put situations in their proper buckets – things that are up to us vs. things that are not up to us.

Anything that is not up to us we’re not going to worry about.  At all.  This is hard – like retrain your brain, new neural pathways hard.

Things that are up to us?  We’re going to give those things 100%.  This is even harder – it’s discipline.

No complaining.  No whining.  No wishing it was different.  Just living life and doing our best to handle what comes our way with dignity, grace and compassion.

We'll feel the sweet relief that comes with the knowledge that we gave this life our all.  We left it all out there on the field. There was nothing more that we could have done.  

We'll be able to go that next place with no regrets.